78:: Entering your soft girl wellness era
This week’s episode is a little ironic — after spending the past month breaking down the science of women’s exercise, from HIIT and SIT to strength training, jump training, warm-ups, and recovery, I’m leaning into something that feels like the opposite: soft girl wellness.
But here’s the truth — they’re more connected than you might think. Wellness isn’t black and white, and it’s not about obsessing over biohacking, metrics, or doing things “perfectly.” It’s about finding balance between structure and softness.
I’m sharing my own soft girl wellness era — how I’m still hitting the foundational exercise pillars as a physical therapist, but in a more intuitive, less regimented way. Think:
- Movement that feels good (HIIT, SIT, jump training, strength training, but with flexibility).
- Recovery & sleep without obsessing over scores or trackers.
- Nutrition that fuels without strict counting.
- Relationships & community as a vital part of health.
- And even the vibes of fall wellness — cozy workouts, lattes, candles, slower mornings, and social fitness.
If you’ve ever felt caught in toxic wellness patterns or pressured by “do it all” routines, this episode will encourage you to embrace a softer, more sustainable approach.
✨ Let’s redefine what real wellness looks like — one that makes room for joy, friendship, and peace of mind alongside fitness and health.
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00:18- 00:39 Introduction to the Soft Girl Wellness Era
00:40- 01:52 Personal Wellness Journey and Trends
01:53- 04:17 Exercise Handbag Series Recap
04:18- 06:05 Transition to Soft Girl Wellness
06:06- 09:26 Defining Soft Girl Wellness
10:02- 16:55 Movement in the Soft Girl Wellness Era
16:56- 21:31 Nutrition and Relationships
21:32- 25:29 Fall Wellness Tips and Conclusion
Mentioned in this episode:
Transcript
I am seeing a general trend of
women shifting from the super
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:regimented biohacking health and
wellness movement to more of this
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:relaxed form of health and wellness.
4
:So let's have a wellness girl chat about
entering our soft girl wellness era.
5
:Welcome back to Wellness Fix the Pod.
6
:I'm your host, Dr.
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:Kelsey Vic, a board certified orthopedic
doctor of physical therapy and a
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:pelvic floor physical therapist.
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:And I'd say that my general vibe
for health and wellness has also
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:been matching this trend where when
Huberman Lab first started, I was
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:probably his number one listener.
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:I think he was my top listen to
podcast quite a few years in a row.
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:I just loved.
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:Hearing about health and wellness
from that perspective and learning
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:about the human body in that way.
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:And honestly, it brought together a
lot of the knowledge that I learned
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:in PT school in a super applicable
way to my own health and wellness.
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:Things that I was learning in
school, like histology, different
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:tissue types, different neuroscience
things, different brain regions.
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:It really helped me to integrate.
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:A lot of the concepts that I learned
in grad school into my own life,
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:which I really loved, and I stuck with
that for a period of time where I was
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:really regimented in all of the sort of
biohacking movements, all of the things
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:to sort of uplevel my health and wellness
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:I still think there is a place for that,
but I'd say over the last probably year
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:or so, I've been entering more into
a soft girl wellness era where I've
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:been trying to be a little bit more
intuitive with my health and wellness.
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:A little bit less focused on
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:Some of the super biohacking ways of doing
health and wellness and moving more into.
30
:Prioritizing certain pillars, which is
why we just finished up with what I called
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:our exercise handbag series, And it was
just a fun way to look at women's health
32
:and wellness from a super non-judgmental
lens, focusing on some of the pillars
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:that we all need to have in our exercise
routines as women, no matter the style
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:of metaphorical exercise handbag that
we like, I found that there can be so
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:much black and white within the women's
health and wellness space where if you're
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:not strength training, you're wrong.
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:If you're not doing Pilates,
you're wrong if you're not.
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:Focusing on getting up early with that
morning sunlight and blocking out blue
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:light and all of these other things.
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:You're wrong and.
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:Yes, there is a place for all of that,
but there's also a place for people
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:who enjoy different forms of health
and wellness to still get some of those
43
:pillars into their exercise routines.
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:So that was the whole premise behind
the exercise handbag series, talking
45
:about ways that we can all incorporate.
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:Essential pillars that we need as
women into our exercise routines.
47
:No matter the style of exercise handbag
that we like, whether we like Pilates
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:or strength or running or dance or
swimming or whatever, we can all find a
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:way to incorporate some of those pillars
into our exercise routines as women.
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:So I'll leave that link to those
episodes below, if you miss that series.
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:It was my way of condensing the broad.
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:Range of you should do this.
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:You shouldn't do that into a
super tangible, actionable way.
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:We talk about ways you can incorporate
the essential of high intensity interval
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:training and sprint interval training.
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:If you enjoy something like Pilates,
which is not typically thought of as
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:something that can be high intensity
or sprint interval training, we
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:talk about how you can incorporate.
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:Jump training, the essential of jump
training, the forgotten essential
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:of jump training into your routine.
61
:If you like something like running or
if you typically like strength training
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:or Pilates or bar or sculpt classes,
there's ways you can incorporate all
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:of those essentials and we talk about
how you can incorporate them and then
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:why they're important for us as women.
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:So if you missed that series, we did it
all throughout the month of September.
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:It was super fun.
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:I hope you guys learned a lot from it.
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:We covered, I believe it
was four true essentials
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:and we had a bonus fifth episode sort
of talking about a pillar for men that
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:might not be that essential or a pillar
for us as women, but one that is.
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:Marketed towards us as a pillar,
so we chat about that too.
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:So I'll leave the link to those
episodes below if you missed them.
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:. So before we talk about entering
our soft girl wellness eras, let's
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:take a trip down memory lane.
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:I'm gonna get a little bit
vulnerable and just share how.
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:Extreme I got with the super biohacking
regimented movement, and I know this
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:is not near the extent that some people
go, and it's not a bad thing at all,
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:but for me, I feel like right now I'm
in an era of trying to be a little
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:bit more intuitive with it, so I.
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:I definitely used to cancel plans
in order to get my sauna in.
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:I used to, in college, even cut
out alcohol for, I think I cut
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:it out for probably a year plus
or so, because I noticed that
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:it raised my resting heart rate.
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:I was tracking a lot of those
variables and I just got so into the
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:objective measures and wanting to
focus on those that I was canceling.
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:Social plans.
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:I was.
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:Taking out alcohol, which, yes, alcohol
is not great for us, but it's not that
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:we can't have it necessarily, there
needs to be a better balance around it.
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:It can affect us in certain ways and it
can affect some people more than others.
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:And of course, Too much of
something like alcohol can lead
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:to way detrimental effects.
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:But the reason that I was doing it
was not because of those detrimental
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:effects, it was because of these
objective measures that I was tracking.
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:So that's where I've been
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:and I'd say there is that part that still
lives within me and that is totally okay.
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:I'm not saying we should
completely get rid of tracking.
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:I love tracking.
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:I think it.
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:Allows us to get a better idea of where
we're currently at and go from there.
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:I think it doesn't allow us to
hide from some of our actions and
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:some of our behaviors that we have.
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:So I think tracking is great, but right
now, I don't know if you guys are like
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:me and like the general trend that I see
in this space, but I feel like we're all
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:shifting more into the middle, where we're
getting a little bit more soft girl with
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:how we treat our health and wellness.
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:How am I defining soft girl wellness?
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:It is treating health and wellness in
a more intuitive way where we move,
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:eat healthy, drink our water, sleep,
stay hydrated, stay consistent with
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:those healthier routines while not
being obsessive over certain variables
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:and certain objective measures
where we move in ways that we want.
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:Making sure to hit those pillars of
our exercise handbags, but not being
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:so obsessed if we don't, and not
guilt tripping ourselves if we don't.
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:Where we can forget
about protein for a bit.
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:I.
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:Am almost sick of seeing all of
these videos come up and all of
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:these ads come about protein.
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:I love protein as much as the next person.
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:It's so important for us.
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:It's so important.
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:It's a building block for so many things
within our bodies, but I think we can
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:oftentimes neglect some of the other
macronutrients that we need, like fats,
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:carbs, some of the other micronutrients
that we need because we're so focused
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:on protein and I really hate how
protein has become a buzzword when in
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:reality it's just an essential for us as
women and for us as humans in general.
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:And lastly, I feel like soft girl
wellness is understanding that true
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:wellness comes not only from the
physical, but from the relational as well.
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:And honestly even more
so from the relational.
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:I just finished prepping an episode that
is gonna be released in November, talking
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:about friendships and relationships as
one of the primary pillars of wellness
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:in general, not necessarily of our
exercise routines like we just chatted
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:about, but of our wellness altogether.
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:Relationships are huge and
high quality relationships.
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:Are actually more beneficial sometimes
than focusing on something like our
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:physical fitness or our nutrition.
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:So if you're like me and have been in
that super biohacking, obsessive objective
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:measurement tracking era of your life,
I want this sort of soft girl wellness
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:era to challenge you, to make you feel
a little bit uncomfortable and think,
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:oh my gosh, is it okay if I do that?
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:Because that's where some
of that change happens.
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:And I think that's what's been
really healthy for me as I've been
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:transitioning into this more intuitive
state of my own health and wellness.
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:Is that I've been forced to think
twice about some of those obsessive
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:and objective thoughts that I used
to have about tracking that are
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:now still resurfacing because I
can be like, Kelsey, chill out.
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:It's okay.
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:You're doing your best.
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:You're staying consistent.
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:You're overall keeping a healthy routine.
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:It doesn't have to be so obsessively
tracked or measured like it used to be.
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:So my hope is that we can all
let go of some of those obsessive
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:tendencies and replace it with more
intuitiveness within our bodies.
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:We all want to do things in the right
way, but is it truly worth sacrificing?
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:What brings us joy, friendship,
and a peace of mind in the process?
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:And that's where my mindset is going
into chatting about what I've been doing
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:in my soft girl wellness era that will
hopefully maybe inspire you to challenge
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:some of your own sort of obsessive
biohacking, super regimented beliefs.
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:So starting off with movement in my Soft
Girl wellness era, movement's huge for me.
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:I love movement.
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:I love human movement.
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:I love analyzing human movement.
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:I love exercise that will always be
a part of my health and wellness.
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:It will always be a part of who I am.
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:It will always be, and it should always be
a part of all of our health and wellness.
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:Given that we're like injury free and
illness free and that movement isn't being
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:performed at a detriment to something else
in our health, so movement is huge for me.
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:And it's something that
I can control right now.
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:And I say that because I understand
that there will come a time in my
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:life where I can't control movement
or that things are happening within
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:my body that, or my brain, that
might limit my movement in some way.
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:So movement's something
I can control right now.
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:And I've been trying to hit those
exercise pillars for women that we talked
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:about in the exercise hand PPI series.
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:So the first one being high
intensity interval training
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:and sprint interval training.
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:And this sounds like the antithesis of
soft girl wellness era, but trust me,
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:it's super important for us as women.
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:Again, check out that episode,
if you wanna learn more about
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:why it's so important for us as
women, even more so than men.
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:And we definitely dive into all of the
science, but for high intensity interval
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:training and sprint interval training.
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:I've been working on getting one
to two sessions a week of one
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:high intensity interval training
and one sprint interval training.
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:And the differences is really minimal.
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:Sprint interval training is that
a hundred percent max effort
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:with that longer recovery.
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:And then high intensity interval
training is again, high effort, maybe
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:not your a hundred percent max effort,
but in that 80 to 90% range with a
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:little bit shorter recovery, so like
a one-to-one work to rest ratio.
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:And it takes me somewhere like
15 to 20 minutes each session.
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:I usually tack it on to maybe a
Pilates class day or an upper body day.
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:I rarely tack it on to a lower body
day just because that's the type of
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:high intensity interval training and
sprint interval training that I'm doing.
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:I'm doing hill sprints and running,
but you can also do swimming.
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:I've done it with swimming
before and I love it.
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:You can do it with just body weight
exercises or high intensity exercises
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:. You can do it with dance, you
can do it with a broad range of
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:activities, but that's how I've
been incorporating it in each week.
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:My husband's also been wonderful and
bikes alongside me while I'm doing
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:some of these, and it's been fun.
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:So not only are we getting
our physical fitness, but our
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:relationship fitness as well.
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:The second pillar is jump training
that we chatted about and jump
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:training is huge for women.
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:I call it bone building on steroids,
but jump training is like one of the
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:easiest to perform every week and add it
into your routine if it's not already.
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:Literally something as simple as three.
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:Times a week doing one set of 10 to 12
jumps has been shown to improve bone
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:mineral density in a meaningful way in
women, young women, especially college
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:aged women, is what the study was done on.
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:So I've been incorporating jump training
just within my strength training routine.
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:So if it's not programmed that
day, I'll add 10 to 12 squat jumps
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:two to three times, or I'll add
jump rope, I'll add split jumps.
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:I just typically do body weight.
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:Jumping and it's super simple.
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:It takes maybe 15 to 20
seconds and it's done.
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:It's added as part of those routines.
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:The third pillar we chatted
about was strength training.
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:And of course this is like the
foundation of my own exercise routine,
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:but I typically do one upper body day
a week, one lower body day a week.
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:And then I've been doing two-ish full
body days a week, and I've actually
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:been trialing ClassPass recently, so
I've been doing a lot more lagree.
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:Reformer, mega former, ex
former Pilates classes and
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:I've been really enjoying that.
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:I'm gonna try today and do it
with a TRX system to see if I can
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:have an at home version as well.
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:But I'm loving those classes.
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:So that's how I've been also entering
into that soft girl wellness era is
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:I've actually been going to these
classes, which I previously was such
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:an at-home workout girly, that these
classes have been so fun to get me
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:out of that old routine of mine and
into this sort of like new schedule.
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:It's also allowed me to meet
other girls and meet some of the
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:instructors in chat, and it's just fun.
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:Again, physical fitness
and social fitness as well.
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:And then the last pillar that we chatted
about that I've been incorporating
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:into my movement routine is this
cool down warmup recovery pillar.
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:And I take daily walks and I used to be so
regimented by getting at least 30 minutes,
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:minimum, 30 to 60 minutes minimum a day.
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:And now I've tried to relax my
mindset around that a little bit.
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:We go on a morning, walk
around 20 to 30 minutes.
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:We go on an evening, walk around like
15 minutes to an hour and a half,
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:depending on what we're chatting about.
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:Basically, depending on other things
not related to me reaching my objective
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:measure for my walking that day.
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:if we do a shorter walk, it's because it's
later and we didn't get to it that day.
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:If we do a longer one, it's because
we're enjoying the conversation or
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:we started it earlier to be able
to do the walk for a longer time.
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:I am trying to be less strict on the
time, and I have written on my notes like,
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:whoa, Kelsey, that's crazy of you to not
actually calculate that, but it's true.
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:It's a big step for me in
my soft girl wellness era.
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:I've also been trying to be
more purposeful with my prayer.
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:Again, always a goal of mine and
then being more purposeful also
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:with my rest throughout the day.
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:If I didn't get good sleep that night,
I will maybe take a nap or I will just
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:shut my brain off for a period of time
in the middle of a work day for 20
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:minutes just to reset and refocus, And
that's been super beneficial for sleep.
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:I have recently had a change in my
sleep tracking because my oura ring
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:broke, and I am severely missing the
cycle tracking and temperature tracking
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:capabilities that the oura ring offered.
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:But I'm actually not missing
too much of anything else.
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:The sleep tracking I would find
myself looking at the sleep score end.
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:Being like, oh, I didn't get good sleep.
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:Oh yeah, I am feeling tired today,
where now I don't have anything telling
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:me how I slept or how I didn't, except
for my own body, which I know crazy.
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:And I think I've done a few episodes
where I've shared my challenge with this
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:and just a warning about it because I
do think it's so easy to rely on those
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:scores to dictate the rest of your day.
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:And I've realized that without my
oura ring, I'm actually able to
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:Listen to what my body's telling me
and respond to that versus responding
270
:to an objective measure from not the
most accurate tool for tracking some
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:of the health and wellness measures.
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:So in this soft girl wellness
era, I've also just basically been
273
:relying on my body for its own
sort of sleep wake times versus.
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:seeing that, okay, I got in bed
at 9:30 PM I went to bed at 11.
275
:I got up at six 30.
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:Oh my gosh, I didn't get my eight hours.
277
:But I've been just trying to navigate
being a little bit more flexible with
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:that and not judge myself for that
because I don't know how long I slept.
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:I don't know when I stopped wrestling
in my sleep at the beginning
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:of the night to go to actual.
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:Like sleep.
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:To have that actual start of
those sleep cycles, I don't know.
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:I lay my head down.
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:I just try and fall asleep on my own, and
then I wake up on my own and I either wake
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:up refreshed or I'm like, you know what?
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:This might be a day for a nap
midday, because I don't feel
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:as refreshed as I typically do.
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:So I know game changing, not having
a tracker, but having to be a little
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:bit more intuitive with how my body
feels when I wake up in the morning.
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:For nutrition and fueling.
291
:Overall, I think I'm having more
smaller meals throughout the day.
292
:I'm definitely having more water and I'm
trying to focus on the big three versus
293
:trying to be super regimented about how
much I'm getting of each macronutrient.
294
:So I'm, as long as I have a protein,
a carb, a fat, I feel like I'm good.
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:And dessert too.
296
:I always end on a little sweet treat.
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:So I've just been trying to
be a little bit more flexible
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:With that nutrition focus as well
299
:for relationships.
300
:This one's actually big and I feel like
this is a huge shift in that soft girl
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:wellness era where my hope is that okay,
maybe we move away from being super.
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:Objective and tracking and super
hard on ourselves for not reaching
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:those health and wellness goals and
instead focusing on what we do have
304
:if we are drinking at a happy hour,
that's investing in those social
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:relationships again, in a healthy way.
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:I'm not saying this, if alcohol affects
you in some way, if you happen to be
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:allergic to it in some way, if it happens
to harm your health in some way, this
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:is not what I'm talking about, but in
general, I feel like the reason I was
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:avoiding some of these social situations
or saying no to them was because I knew
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:that I didn't wanna drink because it
would elevate my resting heart rate,
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:which now I'm like, you know what, Kelsey?
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:Forget it.
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:Your heart rate will come back to
normal as long as you have these.
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:Consistent routines built in and this
foundation built in, you can go have
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:a drink with friends, you can go to
a happy hour with your husband and
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:enjoy it and realize that it's not all
about that physical fitness part, but
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:it's about that social fitness too.
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:So overall I actually have been having
more alcohol, which is wild and maybe
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:not something that I'm like super proud
of, but I'm super proud of what it means
320
:for my mindset, if that makes sense.
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:So instead of no cocktails a week,
I'm having like one to two drinks a
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:week and I'm spending more money on
going out with friends and my husband.
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:Part of that is we recently moved and.
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:That's been a huge contribution to
this soft girl wellness era of mine.
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:We moved to a majorly walkable area,
which was a huge goal of mine, a
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:huge dream of mine to be in a more
walkable area, just because I love
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:the idea of walking to a coffee shop,
walking to happy hour, walking to
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:dinners, walking to meet my family.
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:We're closer to my family, both of our
families now, and they'll say, Hey,.
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:We're in your area.
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:Come meet us for dinner, and
I'll just go walk to dinner.
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:Or my mom will bring their dog to a
coffee shop and I'll bring our dog
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:to a coffee shop and we'll just meet
and catch up for a period of time.
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:And it's been so much fun.
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:But I feel like moving to that more
walkable area, not that everyone
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:has to do that, but for me.
337
:It has been game changing to approach
my external environment in a different
338
:way by being able to walk places and
walk to my nephew's soccer games and
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:walk to the coffee shops to do a little
bit of work or in general, just walk
340
:in a more sort of like downtown area
in the evenings and being able to
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:socialize with the people around us.
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:It's just been so much more fun and
I feel like that's actually been
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:one of the major contributors to
this sort of soft girl wellness era.
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:Where the only time I really
get in my car now is to go
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:treat patients or run errands.
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:I really do try and walk everywhere, which
has been a huge sort of game changer for
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:how I approach overall like living life,
not even health and wellness, even though
348
:that's obviously benefiting from walking
more, but it almost feels more communal.
349
:I see people out on the streets more.
350
:I'm able to say hi.
351
:I see people from all walks
of life a little bit more, and
352
:it's just been a lot of fun.
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:So as a side note, I guess that has
been definitely one of the shifts
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:that has helped me enter into the soft
girl wellness era a little bit more.
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:So what does soft girl
wellness look like for you?
356
:This was just a little bit of a rundown
on what it has looked like for me in these
357
:transition periods that I'm trying to make
to be more intuitive with my own routines.
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:But what are some of the more toxic
either behaviors that you guys have
359
:or thought patterns that you have
that you want to shed and get rid
360
:of in this soft girl wellness era?
361
:For me, again, that toxicity was.
362
:I can't drink alcohol.
363
:I can't go out for social events.
364
:I have to cancel social events
because of my dedicated sauna time.
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:All of those are beneficial things,
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:but toxic in regards to other
components of my own health and
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:wellness that are super important
to me, like my relationships.
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:So are you someone who has also cut
out certain things because of how they
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:affect your objective measurements?
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:Do you sacrifice sleep for
an early morning workout?
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:Again, not bad, but sleep
is super important too.
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:Are you following certain wellness
gurus or wellness influencers that are
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:making you feel bad about your current
routine or how you're approaching life?
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:And again, some of that,
we need that discipline.
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:we need that accountability.
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:But it can also go too far.
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:And as we enter into this fall, I think
our soft girl wellness era can also
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:be influenced by the season that we're
in and the environment that we're in.
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:So to end, just a few little things
that I'm doing this fall to help
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:this sort of like soft girl wellness
side of my life a little bit more.
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:And honestly, romanticizing health
and wellness, because that's
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:what it really comes down to.
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:Something as simple as cozier warmer
colors for fall workout outfits, I have
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:this like dark green set, a darker purple.
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:I'm shifting from those brighter colors
to those darker workout sets, candles,
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:lit or dimmed lights during early
morning workouts, especially as this
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:time change happens where it's starting
to get darker, stay darker for longer.
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:I like to do a little
bit more of dim lights.
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:Or candles and more ambient
lighting during my workouts.
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:Soft music playing.
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:I know this is a controversial, but
I always have soft coffee shop music
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:going is what I call it during my
workouts because I dunno, I just
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:like to have a little bit more of
a peaceful start to my workout.
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:Especially when I do 'em in the mornings.
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:In the afternoons I do hype it up a little
bit, but for morning workouts, I like to
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:have a little bit of a softer music on.
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:When I'm working out at home,
sometimes I'll also have my favorite
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:like TV show on in the background.
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:That way I can just work
out while I'm watching TV or
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:watching a fall movie, fall.
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:Friend workouts, of course,
slow morning lattes or tea.
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:I've been trying to be more
purposeful about taking it easy
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:and starting my morning slow rather
than rushing right into the workday.
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:If you've listened to the pod for a
while, you know, I love working out
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:with like jewelry and possibly makeup,
and now I've recently been like trying
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:to figure out how to do my hair a
little bit better and maintain that
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:blowout for a longer period of time.
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:So I've been doing more claw clips,
which is a silly way, but to me
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:it's romanticizing that workout,
romanticizing my health and wellness
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:a little bit more because I do.
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:Have this like fresh blowout that
I wanna protect a little bit.
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:So it's funny, but to me that is soft
girl wellness, warmer, richer perfume
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:sense, I think of more spiced or vanilla
flavors versus these like super floral,
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:fresh flavors, fall squash and soups.
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:Of course, this is like something
that I'm super excited about in Texas.
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:We're not quite there yet.
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:We've done it out of just desire,
but we're not at the point
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:where false soups and warm cozy
meals are weather appropriate.
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:But hey, if it's the vibes,
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:That's what we're going for.
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:And then lastly, I feel like this has
been a big focus this episode, but
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:social fitness over physical fitness.
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:So movie nights with friends, happy
hours, not necessarily canceling
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:plans for a workout, maybe asking
your friend to come for a walk and
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:getting both in, but really thinking.
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:Not that, oh, I'm gonna miss my workout.
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:I am doing a bad thing for my health
and wellness by missing my workout or
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:missing this health and wellness behavior,
but thinking, oh no, I'm investing in
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:something that is arguably way more
important than physical fitness, which
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:is that social fitness and the quality
of the relationships that I have.
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:So I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.
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:It's a little bit more relaxed.
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:I like to mix it up.
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:We've been super sciencey with some of
the exercise handbag series and although
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:I try and keep it fun, it does get
pretty like sciencey and so I like to
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:ebb and flow with these more relaxed,
casual wellness girl chat episodes.
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:So I hope you enjoyed this episode.
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:Thank you so much for all of your sport.
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:I love educating, I love
doing these episodes.
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:I am just grateful for you guys for
wanting to chat about some of these
441
:topics and learn about your bodies,
and if you guys ever have any topics
442
:that you want me to cover or anything
you wanna learn more about or . Topics
443
:that might not be in my wheelhouse,
but that I can bring on an expert for.
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:I'm working on a lot of different
guest experts right now coming up,
445
:so I'm super excited about those.
446
:But if you guys have any topics that you
want please don't hesitate to reach out.
447
:I would love to curate certain episode
topics based on what you guys want.
448
:So thank you guys so much.
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:If you benefited from this episode or
any episodes or like this podcast, I
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:would love if you could rate reviews,
share any of the episodes that you find
451
:enjoyable, and yeah, I think that's all.
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:We'll wrap it up for this Soft Girl
Wellness Girl chat, but I hope you
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:guys enjoy this episode and I'll
see you guys again on the next
454
:episode of Wellness Big Sis the pod.
